XX Chromosome

Ah Bing Proofed Why You Dont Need Tight Abs to Hang Out With Gorgeous Ladies

 

That’s Rachel in the photo.

Rachel was having streak of unfortunate events lately.

To make it worse, most of her friends came back KK for Chinese New Year celebration and she’s alone at Australia.

I decided to cheer her up.

“Hey Rachel, let’s go yum cha loh! Party Play this Thursday, Aussie-gang.”

“Ok, see you there” <— A sarcasm reply.

So, I had this brilliant idea to print out her photo, and “join” us. She’s “there”, but not physically..

PS: Hope you feeling better now, Rachel.

PPS: Now you owe me a kiss for making you happy :)

There’s another reason for gathering — Jenny’s birthday!

Jenny is a happy-go-lucky girl. Her positive thoughts are unprecedented, and her sporty characteristic brings many men weak on their knees.

We gave her a chocolate fondant cake. She’s happy.

We’re not allowed to touch her chocolate fondant, she gains all the weight. I am happy :D

*** 3 hours later ***

I joined The Girls for dinner.

Candle light dinner with so many gorgeous ladies.

My balls kembang man…

Whole night I felt like walking in the wind.. no one is luckier than me :)

Clock wise from top right: Pheon, Alice, Nana, Yvonnie and 鳥人! (middle)

In order to make myself presentable, I had to breath in and tuck in my huge belly.

I asked the ladies, “do you prefer your boyfriend with 6 packs, or huge belly?”

Answer: “Medium size belly — like yours. 6 packs are disgusting! Your size is perfect for hugs”

/gasp! (my balls are going to explode)

“Come, hug me!” was repeating in my mind.

Chance of success in my Slow-Carb diet seems dangerously low.

/gasp! x 2

I had garden salad for dinner.

“Bing!! That’s the only dish you eat? Serious bah??”

“Yes, why are you girls so curious? I am on diet ok…” I replied.

“But you’re so fat…”

(…balls shrunk to raisin size)

So I ordered this.

Diet plan? Aiyah.. later restart again la! :D 死就死啦！

I had so much fun hanging out with the ladies — too bad these chances are becoming rare because 3 of them are getting marry soon.

Damn.

In future, I can show my son this photo and say, “Papa was very famous, all the gorgeous ladies queue up to have dinner with Papa.”

“Until you met mama?”

“No — until you accidentally pop out.”

CHOI!!! what a crazy thought.

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9 Almost Free Romantic Ideas for Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s around the corner again.

Oh noooooo… this year I have to come up with a Valentine’s idea. Never had to worry anything past few years because I was single and I joked at friends who had troubles come up with ideas how to surprise their partner.

Not anymore. Now I am on the same boat.

I stayed up whole night yesterday to brainstorm for some affordable Valentine’s ideas – These ideas are not probably the best but it’s definitely suitable for damnnnn poor people like me.

Let’s hope that my girlfriend doesn’t read my blog post, until post-Valentine’s :)

So here are some of my ideas to celebrate an affordable Valentine’s day.

1) Make a short video

Take out your camera phone or webcam – speak to the camera as you were declaring love for your love one. The video don’t have to be long and windy, just express your gratitude and love under 60 seconds. You can do it anywhere, coffee shops, in the car, while hanging out with friends. Take a 5-10 seconds clip everywhere and compile it into a 1 minute video.

Upload the video to sites like Youtube or Vimeo and send her the link. You can also keep it personal by sending the video through mobile phone or burn it to CD.

2) Make your own roses

There are plenty of online tutorials for making paper roses. Here’s one. Why spend hundreds of dollars on flowers that doesn’t last long? Sincere is what it counts right? Make her lots of paper roses, ask your mum and housemaid to sit on a table and fold the flowers together. You’ll get 100 flowers in 8 hours time.

Here’s the catch: Hide the flowers in different spot a park or a mall. Invite her over and give her a rose, attach a note to it informing her where to find the next rose. This should be the case with each rose and last one should lead her to you waiting with a bouquet of flowers.

3) Extended hug and “I love you”

This sounds simple but it’s incredibly effective. When was the last time you hug your partner for more than 5 minutes and say I love you?

Note: No iPhones when hugging please.

Photo credit: ~Defies

4) Cook for her

Open your browser and search for cooking recipes online. There are sooooo many awesome recipes online. Even if it doesn’t turn perfect and your cooking skills don’t prove amazing, she’ll be pleasantly surprised and love you for your serious attempt.

Or you can try to my older blog post, e.g. How to Cook Marinara Spaghetti

Note: Bonus for you if you can prepare set meal, including dessert.

5) Write a love letter

Have your girlfriend seen your hand writings before? This is a perfect chance to do it, your hand writing doesn’t have to be perfect, but you must at least keep the writings tidy.

I mean, write a love letter with a pen, not keyboard.. printing out the love letter is a big no-no.

6) Prepare ingredients and cook together

Whether this means planning a date night or watching a romantic movie at home or simply making dinner together, the key is to use the time for just the two of you. Make it time you can spend together, talking, relaxing and taking a breather from the rest of the world for a few hours.

7) Photo collage

Make a collage of those beautiful moments spent together with this online tool: ShapeCollage.com. You can make it yourself if you’re familiar with photo edit tools like Photoshop or Paint Shop Pro.

8) Work on your guitar

Sing her favorite song in front of her. Look into her eyes while singing. If you make mistakes, laugh and continue. Then a gentle kiss on her cheek. Perfect.

9) Burn a CD

Burn a CD of a collection of romantic songs, or even better the one gifting it could actually record yourself singing.

****

I found a quote worth sharing,

“Women want to feel pretty or appreciated”

For mom/wife/family: a spa treatment, a thoughtful excursion together, jewelry, high quality lotions, extended hug and “I love you.”

For female friend/co-worker: a candle, plant(not flowers!), hand-written token of appreciation/respect (in a card)”

Do you have any more ideas that’s not included in this list?

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30+ Friends at Singapore Waiting For Me To Drink Beer (and Eat Pork Knuckle) With Them

Brotzeit is becoming one of my favourite to go places at Singapore.

Well, any places with nice beer is my favourite place. Any place with draft beers is my home ;)

German Pork Knuckle – the legendary pork knuckle Shannon has been telling to me about. S$32 for this kaki babi. Anyone knows the cost for pork knuckle at Malaysia? Just wondering.

To my surprise, this pork knuckle was deep fried, different from the stewed pork knuckle I had at Adelaide’s German village. The skin is like siu yok, crunchy crunchy one. Side dishes include salad potato, pickles and more pickles.. and MORE PICKLES.

I had 2 pickles and small slice of pork knuckle only.. the beer had all my attention. Hahaha.

My high school friends! Hai Yang (@OceanCohen) and Vui San.

Priscilla and Irene. I am selling their phone numbers for $10 each. If you want me to convey message to them, $1 for each sms (max 160 characters). Both ladies are very famous now – got career, certificate, angelic face and devilish look. (Promote gao gao so I get lots of business!!)

Mind you, you will face a stiff competition. The ladies are in their prime era now. I am definitely not in this market – too stress.

Group photo of us that night.  A few didn’t show up :(   or else you’ll get to see more leng luiz. From left to right – Me, Shannon, Shoey, Lip San, Vui San, Read Learn, Hai Yang, Mr Lame, Irene and Priscilla.

All born in same year – the year of moo moo.

We went to the garden above Vivo City to have a stroll. Meet up with more high school friends..

Based on our calculation, we have around 30+ high school friends working/residing at Singapore, and that haven’t include our seniors and juniors ^^;

If they offer me to stay at their place for one week each, I would save $3,000 in rent… whoa. (continue counting…)

Here’s another leng luiz photo for the readers.

Ready to do business with me yet?

The gang separated into two groups – The ladies gaga™ and The lanjiaos gaga™. All lanjiaos continue drink because I wanted to :P The late comers are not intoxicated yet. It’s not fair we’re having all the fun, right?

By the way, is it illegal to drink at street? I know Australia is strict about drinking at street – you masuk jail one o. Many smart ass put their liquors into plastic bottles, but still busted by cops. Funny people, hai..

What’s the best thing to do after beer?

Supper.

What’s the best thing to do after supper?

Daring friends for another supper.

Gahhh, I am missing Double McSpicy Chicken as I am typing this. And the garlic chili sauce!! and the shake shake fries… the fries taste like keropok. But it’s heavenly oily. OHHHH YEAAAAH.

Irene says my ass is sexy in this photo, what do you think? Only mou liu people like us can take these photos.

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My Goals – Pretty Girls And Fast Cars

Did I get your attention? I am sure I did. Both the girls in above photos are gorgeous right? On the left is Theresa, right is Siew. I love both of them :)

I like to hang out with attractive girls. Especially ones with great personality, great smile and smart brain.

I tell you a secret… I have fetish for short hair girl.

I will totally lose control, like “wahhhhhhhhh she has short hair shit man I’m going after her UHHH LA LAAAAA”…

Unfortunately, Theresa prefers long hair. I will court her if she cut her hair short. /slurps.

Like my shirts says, “Life Begins at 40″. I want to meet at many girls as possible before 40. Keep looking until I find the right one.

I am currently single. But not available. I have to admit, I do have many attractive female friends around me. I appreciate each and everyone of them :)

Problem is, I am categorized as BFF (Best Friend Forever). Like, hold hands go watch movie also won’t get suspicious. So far that haven’t happen la, who want to try? hheheheehhe.

I am only 25 this year. I want to spend 100% focus on my career for the first 15 years before I reach 40.

So I can get this million dollar car. Mitsuoka. Hmmm. sexy.

Somehow I felt like I’m driving a kancil. The driver seat is too small.

Anyway, back to original topic… heheh sorry sorry.

Not everyone is heading the same direction, though. Some prefer to be in 9am-5pm job. Some work for parents. Some prefer not to work until the right chance arise.

Me? I prefer to work for myself. I am not planning to waste few years of my time to work for others. Why? For all the effort and time I spent on others – the real benefit goes to the boss. Not yourself. You can earn experience and money. But TIME is forever gone.

You are your own best asset. Why invest on others? I might be narrow minded but I have a clear path. Since I have chosen my path – I will work hard for it.

I’m only 25, I got nothing to lose. Time, energy, money, knowledge, skill, perseverance, willing to learn – are my assets.

This might be a wishful thinking. At least I am working on it. What about you? ;)

I wrote a similar article about what path I am heading – Seek Danger

I am getting myself a Mercedes Benz when I earn my first million.

It’s my way or the high way.

Diu nya seng!!! (totally unnecessary)

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Noisy Girls At Wagamama Restaurant

Hanging out with bunch of pretty girls are very stress.

Not the people-looking-at-me those kind of stress, it’s more like, damn-you-girls-are-so-noisyyyyyyyyy kind of stress.

Never ending topics. Fuhhhh!!

During CNY, my ex-classmates went to Siew’s house for visit (main purpose: ang pao). You know la, one whole year didn’t meet, the topic…. flow like river. Talk talk talk talk talk. We talked until we sent off a friend at airport, then continue talk talk talk talk talk at Old Town Cafe with more ex-classmates joining us.

(P/S: the talking starts from 12noon until 6:30pm)

Finally, dinner time! We came to conclusion “okay we’re tired, let’s end this today”

As usual, I am the destined driver… My driving skill paling cekap bah, what to do? Hahahha nolah. It’s only because my house is strategically situated between their house. So, naturally I’m the driver.

When I sent them to Siew’s house, another topic arise..

“Hey… that XXX broke up with XXX already meh?”

“Yawohhh…. she even have another child another guy already OMG!!”

=__=” < ---- me

"Ah Bing!! WE don't want to go home yet! Let's go dinner together!!"

"Do I have a choice?"

...obviously not ^^;

Clockwise from top left: Siew, Delonia, Candy, Lily. All funny looking face.. it’s a trend ok!

We went to Wagamama Japanese restaurant at Lintas Square. This is only a small part of the class gathering. When all the classmates combine.. walau eh.. BISING gao gao.

When we walked into restaurant.. I can feel a bit 殺氣 from other customers, especially tables with only males ^^;

Clockwise from top left: Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing.

Siew requested me to make my nostrils big big. I regretted taking her advice. I had no choice. If I don’t listen to her, they won’t go home.

Is okay. My nostrils are naturally huge. Parents don’t have such feature… maybe from nenek moyang like 1000+ years ago. My sis always laugh at me T_T

Snapped a few photos during their “break”.. as in stopping their mouth and refuel with cold ocha. Rare chance you know..

Too bad, despite hanging out with so many pretty girls, I can’t flirt any of ‘em T_T all of them have categorised me as BFF.

Best Friend Forever.

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